Ep. 75 Sober & Strong in Midlife: Empowering Women to Thrive Without Alcohol

Listen to the PODCAST Here
Watch the Podcast on YouTube Here

Redefining Aging: Embracing Curiosity, Mindset, and Joy in Life’s Next Chapter

How Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs Can Transform Your Relationship with Aging—and Yourself

Introduction: The Power of Questioning the Narrative

Aging is a universal experience, yet so much of how we approach it is rooted in societal expectations, outdated narratives, and unexamined beliefs. In Episode 75 of the Feel It Alcohol Free Podcast, hosts Ruby Williams and Susan Larkin sit down with guest Debbie Talbert, a mindset coach with a knack for helping women—especially grandmothers—navigate longevity with zest and self-compassion. Through their candid conversation, they shed light on powerful ways to rethink aging, demonstrating how fostering curiosity, challenging subconscious beliefs, and embracing purposeful living can create not just more years in your life, but more life in your years.

Challenging the “Broken” Narrative

One of the most insidious stories that can shape our experience of growing older is the belief that “something is wrong” with us—or worse, that we are broken. Debbie Talbert shares how she, like many women, once accepted this idea without question, feeling that her struggles (whether with alcohol or aging) must be a sign of personal failure. It wasn’t until she paused to consider her own thinking—rather than just her behavior—that things began to shift. 

She highlights that, often, we hustle for change with willpower or self-criticism, when the real turning point comes from cultivating awareness and self-compassion. This reframing allows us to move from self-judgment to curiosity, opening the door to sustainable and authentic change.

The Power of Mindset and the “Scientific Approach”

The hosts and Debbie agree that approaching life with a scientific mindset—becoming curious rather than judgmental about our experiences—yields the best results. Debbie, drawing on her background as a flight attendant, likens this to the pre-flight check: a time to pause, observe, and ask questions, rather than blame ourselves when turbulence arises.

Ruby and Susan add that this curiosity can be applied not just to quitting alcohol, but to all aspects of life, including aging. When we catch ourselves in drama, anxiety, or “shoulds” (i.e., I should look younger, should have achieved more by now), Debbie suggests we ask, “What’s going on in my brain right now?”—a subtle but powerful shift that transforms self-talk from accusation to investigation.

Rethinking Aging: Culture and Mindset

A big part of changing how we age involves questioning the messages we've internalized about what it means to grow older. The podcast discusses examples like the title of Brooke Shields’ book *Brooke Shields Is Not Allowed to Get Old*, underscoring society’s discomfort with aging women and its pressure to stay “forever young.” Debunking the myth that age limits our possibilities, the hosts and guest share stories of women reinventing themselves in their 60s, 80s, and beyond.

Debbie asserts that your future hasn’t unfolded yet—everything is still possible, even if the culture tells you otherwise. The internal change must come first: “If you don’t start with yourself, the changes around you won’t stick,” she says. By examining and updating our beliefs, we’re able to reclaim agency over our lives at any stage.

The Oxygen Mask Framework: Practical Tools for Change

Debbie introduces her “Oxygen Mask Framework,” inspired by flight safety routines. Its steps: pause; pray or pay attention; and proceed with purpose. This can be applied whether you’re feeling overwhelmed by a new life chapter, uncertain about your future, or simply wanting to age with more joy. The framework encourages reflection before reaction, helping you identify your desires, intentions, and next best steps.

She also shares a practical “magic question” to break free from complaint or stagnation: “So, what do I want?” This shift in focus turns dissatisfaction into an opportunity for growth and discovery.

Finding Joy, Purpose, and Connection

The conversation underscores that joy and pain are often intertwined, and experiencing both is part of a rich, meaningful life. By letting ourselves feel and acknowledge both, we build resilience and a deeper sense of joy. Debbie and the hosts champion the idea of finding and pursuing what lights you up—whether that means reconnecting with grandchildren, diving into new adventures, or simply cultivating awareness around your thoughts.

Conclusion: Aging Flipped—Your Life, Your Way

The overarching message is clear: Aging doesn’t have to mean fading away—it can be a time of discovery, vitality, and reinvention. By questioning old stories, applying curiosity, and intentionally creating meaning, you can flip the script on aging and step confidently into your next chapter—no matter where you are on life’s journey.
____

Listeners have said that our podcast has helped them get alcohol free! So we created Feel Lit 21, a way for you to press your reset button and take a 21 day break from alcohol. Every day you will receive emails with videos, journal prompts, and the inspiration you need to embrace 21 days without alcohol that feels lit!
https://feellitpodcast.com/FeelLit21-sg

 Find community and connection on the Feel Lit Alcohol Free Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/feellitalcoholfreepodcast

Ruby Williams at Freedom Renegade Coaching https://www.freedomrenegadecoaching.com/

Follow Coach Ruby: @rubywilliamscoaching
Email: [email protected]